The impact

Sigh, I thought the impact he left behind was negligible. Or I should say, the effect had vanished long time ago because he did influenced me time after time before this. And I deemed the aftermath had cleared away when my heart broke into million pieces, but it seems ain't like that.

The feeling of scare and insecure are with me all the time, whenever and wherever I am. They follow me and retain within me. I know their existence, but I just ignored them and think that everything will be fine then. However, I still can't cope with it though I'm working hard for it. Oh ya, please don't think that I am still loving that damn guy, am just talking about the terribly impact he gave me. What is the impact then ? Well, he made me afraid of being fall in love -- insecure more exactly, or doesn't believe in it anymore.

When it comes, I think I can manage it well. Yea, it is apparently, but isn't went on smoothly deep in my heart. Perhaps, time is the thing I need after all. And, maybe patient ?! It's just too hard to cope with the contradiction, rushes on everything indicate terminates it ahead of time.

by_bittercoffee